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Joke of the Day

"For a final paper, I was assigned to write 3000 words So I put 3 pictures in there."

"My 6yo's homework today is learning how to count backwards. Yep that teacher knows about DUIs alright!"

"Did you hear about the guy who gave Jesus bad directions? He went to hell, but at least he turned a prophet!"

"I like that they put Bibles in hotel rooms. You never know when you're going to run into a vampire who's on a road trip."

"What do you get when you drop your frozen waffle at the beach? A San Diego"

"Today is the best day to propose to your girl... If she accept, its your luck! If not, tell her its April fools!"

"Never sit down in front of the computer while having breakfast because when you get up it'll be dinner time."

"I stole a Tom Cruise movie from the store the other day... It was Risky Business."

"I was astonished to learn that the meat in Subway was slaughtered in a traditional Muslim way. I mean how the fuck do they fit a rucksack on a cow?"

"What's black and white, and red all over. And cant fit through a revolving door? A nun with a javelin through her."