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Joke of the Day

"DAD: Think an earthquake's coming. MOM: Check Rocky; dogs always know. DOG *analysing seismic data*: I anticipate magnitudes of 6 or more."

"Bailiff: State your name for the court Hr: Clara Sofia Alba Constanza Guadalupe... Judge: That's enough I want to get out of here b4 lunch!"

"My pants say yoga but my ass says more cupcakes please"

"I don't understand why we give bad kids coal. Isn't coal what minors want?"

"What's white and can't climb trees? A refrigerator"

"Let them know how much you care. This holiday season, say it with a mass text."

"Yo momma is so fat her butt is the butt of every joke."

"I can feel my personality turning a dull shade of grey when I talk to you."

"A young girl walks in on her dad peeing... The dad fumbles around trying to cover up. Then the girl says ""don't worry dad. I've seen one before. Mommy brushes her teeth with the neighbor's."""

"I picked up a hitchhiker. You gotta when you hit them."