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Joke of the Day

"A guy walks into a bar and asks the guy across from him why his hands were all over his face: The guy across replies: ""Because I am a clock you drunk fuck."""

"How do you walk out of a Casino with $1 Million? Walk in with $2 Million."

"CHILLING WITH ESKIMOS Q: What do Eskimos get from sitting on a block of ice? A. Polaroids."

"Him: You have such a beautiful soul. Me: It's photoshopped."

"my shower curtain grabbing my thigh while I was washing my hair is the most action I've gotten in a long time."

"Did you hear the news? The guy who invented predicted text died. His funerals on funfair"

"Q. What does a woman's asshole do when she is having an orgasm? A. He is usually home with the kids!"

"How about a month filled with stress and obligation? - Pitch for December"

"A psychic dwarf escaped an institution for the criminally insane... It took police weeks to track down the small medium at large."

"What was the last thing that Columbus said to his sailors before getting on the ship? ""Okay men, get on the ship."""