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Joke of the Day

"Best garage sale ever! It's not advertised, nobody's here and it's all free! It's like my neighbor accidentally left his garage door open."

"It sucks that Mary and Joseph couldn't get a room at an inn..... but what were they expecting not having a reservation on Christmas Eve of all nights!"

"what has 2 legs in the morning and 3 in the afternoon? I have no idea but it's in my basement please send help."

"Life is like a penis... Life is like a penis - simple, relaxed and hanging free... It's women who make it hard!"

"Why did the Jew vote for Obama? Because he promised change."

"How did Isis move from 5th wanted terrorist group to the most wanted terrorist group? They cut a head"

"What's brown and sticky? My poop."

"The iPhone 6 looks pretty cool, but it still lets people leave voicemails, so they apparently haven't worked out all the bugs yet."

"Why don't you put eggs in a microwave? Because they eggsplode. :D"

"Oh, so when a survivor takes an arrow to the head, it's a ""tragedy."" But when a zombie get hit, it's a ""good kill."" Hypocrites."