72074
Joke of the Day
"[panting, 5 minutes into sex] It's okay, just go on without me"
Next Joke
"What did the astronomer say when the government launched a napalm bomb to the seventh planet Uranus is on fire"
"if ur mom kisses the dog he becomes ur dad"
"This morning, 2 evangelists knocked on the door selling Jesus. If they would've thrown in a Slap Chop, I would've been sold."
"[Doctor's Office] Doctor: The bad news is you have 3 months to live. Me: What's the good news? Doctor: You should make it til Shark Week"
"I'm usually more of a Samantha but sometimes I am such a Carrie, like when a bucket of blood got dumped on my head at prom"
"Shoutout to Amy Winehouse She's been drug free for 5 years now"
"A bank is a place that will lend you money.... if you can prove that you don't need it."
"How was your day? -You know in Die Hard when he runs barefoot over broken glass? That bad? -Oh no. It's just a cool scene. My day was decent"
"How to give a good hand job... Step 1: Use your mouth."