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Joke of the Day

"[Doctor's Office] Doctor: The bad news is you have 3 months to live. Me: What's the good news? Doctor: You should make it til Shark Week"

"What do you call an eskimo with no friends? An iglooser"

"I entered the word bit*h into my GPS and guess what, I'm in your driveway!!"

"90s kids won't get this, either ... Psych!"

"Why don't parrot's like black people? Because Polly wants a cracker."

"If you crossed a cow with a goat what would you get? Half and half!"

"I'm allergic to bears. One bear bite & it's straight to the ER for me."

"A keytar walks into a bar... And the barkeeper tells him: 'Get lost, we don't serve your type in here...' 'Why not?' ask the instrument. 'Well, you're obviously off your rocker.'"

"What does Lamar Odom have in common with a hooker? Excellent ball control."

"Did you hear about the dog that's become the first to officially own pieces of art? He's the first dog to be able to lick his own Pollocks"