71745

Joke of the Day

"Rene Descartes walks into a bar. The Bartender says, ""Hey, Rene, you want a scotch?"" Descartes replies, ""No, I think not."" And then he vanishes. No dice."

"I just gave up reading a bad book on lock picking couldn't get into it at all."

"I was confused why my college wanted me to report my Mexican friend to the police Then j realised they were just asking me to turn in my essay."

"I just invented a new word: plagiarism."

"There's only 7,100 cheetahs left in the wild. Scientists say they are racing towards extinction."

"I can't see how this day could get any worse. First, my baby cousin went missing... And now my pet snake has a huge tumor"

"If FedEx and Ups merged would they call it Fed UP?"

"A GoFundMe, so I can buy an avocado."

"We didn't have Legos when I was a kid. We had Lincoln Logs & we could build anything with them: big cabin, small cabin, you name the cabin."

"My life is like a romantic comedy except there's no romance and its just me laughing at my own jokes."