71715

Joke of the Day

"I bet if Jeff Bridges picked up your kid from school today & said ""I'm your dad now,"" your kid wouldn't even question it."

"What do you do to an elephant with three balls? Walk him, and pitch to the giraffe!"

"What's the difference between a lawyer and a duck? People sometimes get upset if you shoot a duck. The duck is much less greasy. BUT MOST IMPORTANT Nobody ever complains about a duck's bill."

"Someone's overfeeding that damn cat. I mean.. there's something like Stonehenge in her litter box."

"Gonna get my girlfriend a pickaxe for Valentine's Day. Because she's a Minor"

"Some people just have a way with words... ...and other people ... oh ... not have way."

"What is the difference between Susan Boyle and a aircondtioner? An aircondtior can be hot"

"*wakes up drenched in sweat* WAS BINGO THE FARMER OR THE DOG?"

"Wanna hear a girlfriend joke? Nah, you won't get it"

"I taught my maths class how to use a protractor, with varying degrees of success."