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Joke of the Day

"It was recently revealed that 25% of women are being treated for mental illness. Scary shit. It means 75% are running around untreated."

"My girlfriend let out a huge sigh during sex then I had to tape back the hole I punctured in her"

"Charles Manson not only got a woman while in prison, but a woman that only wanted him for his body. Screw Tinder, I'm going to prison."

"I just wanna make a lot of money and not do very much, is that so wrong?"

"A joke is a lot like sex Neither is any good if you don't get it."

"[Ventriloquist Mafia] ""Oh we have ways of making people talk."""

"Know what OBGYN stands for? OBGYN: Oh Boy! Got You Naked!"

"A fish swims into a wall Dam"

"How many lead trumpets does it take to screw in a light bulb? One, he just holds the light bulb up, and the world revolves around him."

"I used to date a periodicals librarian... ...but we broke up because she had too many issues."