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Joke of the Day
"My girlfriend let out a huge sigh during sex then I had to tape back the hole I punctured in her"
Next Joke
"Darth Vader: ""Listen Luke, this is a new arrangement for both of us. Let's not force things. Just let me know if you need a hand."""
"Q: What's the motto of the Polish Solidarity Union? A: Every man for himself."
"What do you say to Jennifer Anniston after she has been stabbed? So noone told you knife was gonna be this way?"
"My friend told me he had the body of a Greek god I had to explain that Buddha isn't Greek."
"Some people just need a high-five. in the face... with a chair... twice."
"If I don't mention you, then the tweet/status wasn't about you. But if the shoe fits, then lace that bitch up and wear it."
"Why are black people unable to get a Ph.D.? Because they can't get past their Masters."
"[texting] you mean the wolf to me -wolf? ha! autocorrect fail! -lol what i meant to say was...you're a mean wolf to me"
"What do monsters play when they are in the bus? Squash."