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Joke of the Day

"This old dude from Europe is everywhere. The one that is making everybody cry."

"I dated a soccer player once. I also learned a new word that's in poor taste to yell out during climax."

"What's Gordon Ramsey's favorite film? IT'S FUCKING FROZEN!!"

"When I was a kid, I knocked out the power in my house. Mom said it was just a phase."

"My prediction for the fight. I predict Mayweather with a massive right hook and an uppercut to finish it. Then once he's done practicing on his girlfriend, he will lose on points to Manny."

"Uh oh. My car's GPS asked me, ""Who's Siri?"""

"My girlfriend's best friend had her arm stuck in the dirt this morning She asked me how to get her hand out quickly. I told her, ""Dig south for her arm, bae."""

"I feel bad for women who say finding true love is the best experience in life. They've obviously never found their bra size on clearance."

"(After you win something, say this to the loser). You're like an Italian man with his foot in his mouth (Italian accent) You tasted defeat."

"Have you ever met a fractal? They're so conceited. I mean, they're so full of themselves."