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Joke of the Day

"A Mexican magician says: ""on the count of three, I will disappear..."" and he went: ""onu, dos..."" and POOF! he disappeared without a trace"

"Went into the kitchen to look for pot and all I found were pans."

"I once called a psychic. She asked who was on the line, so I hung up."

"What do we want? Low flying plane noises! when do we want em? Nnneeeeeeeeyyyyyoooooowwwww"

"When does a Mexican know he's hungry? His asshole stops burning."

"What's the difference between England and a cup of tea? The teabag stays in the cup longer."

"Nothing worse than, after sex, looking down and seeing that limp used Condom hanging off your dick... Particularly when you weren't wearing one when you started."

"Conjecture: At some point in 2013, our neighbors will get so high that they accidentally sell their own weed. For weed money. To buy weed."

"Why did the podiatrist want to change careers? Because he always felt defeat."

"Ten years from now mankind will be illiterate, and we'll only communicate through pictures of our breakfasts."