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Joke of the Day

"Ever hear about the Roman general who had a fit every time there was cold weather? Hail.. seizure"

"I always use incognito mode when looking at porn and video game walkthroughs. I don't want my wife to think I'm a cheater."

"What did the buffalo say to his son as he left for School?! Bison"

"Man in a pasture face down A man lays face down in the pasture with a backpack on his back and flies buzzing around him. Question: Whats in his backpack? Answer: Parachute"

"Are you a can of mountain dew? Cause I'd mountain dew you."

"Yo mama's so fat... when she stood on the scales, they said ""To be continued."""

"If you can't convince them, confuse them."

"ME: So. You from around here? HER: Yes. You're in my bedroom closet."

"How do you know the devil is white? Because he owns hell, he doesn't work for hell."

"DON'T make this weird... (I whisper in your ear, as I pet your eyebrows)"