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Joke of the Day

"2 queers walk past the city morgue.. 1st turns to the 2nd and asks "" wanna stop in and suck down a cold one"""

"Jokes from a college student. How to use green, yellow, and pink in a sentence? The phone goes green, green, green, I pink it up, and say yellow."

"[mall food court] Me: *stomach rumbling* OMG not now Brain: Too bad you hate using public washrooms My White Undies: Sweet baby jesus no"

"What does a dyslexic agnostic wonder about? Is there a dog?"

"What has 132 legs and 8 teeth? The front row of a garth brooks concert."

"One of my exes left me bcuz, according to her, I'll never amount to anything. 15 years later & let me just say this... Lucky guess."

"If you laid all the veins in your body end to end... you'd be dead."

"""I thought I was happy, but then you revved your engine so loudly and I realised YOU are what's been missing from my life"" - No girl, ever."

"Two lorry's crashed into each other, one containing terrapins the other containing tortoises... It was a turtle disaster."

"What's the difference between the Leafs and a Pornstar? They both get fucked. They both get paid. But only one of them really enjoys it."