7000

Joke of the Day

"What does your mom and a rain forest have in common? If you look deep enough in the bush, you might find a cockatoo."

"Secret to wine tasting is to open the bottle and allowing it to breathe If it doesn't look like it is breathing, then give it a mouth-to-mouth"

"I wish someone would leave a horse's head in my bed so that when my kids sneak up on me in the morning, I can be like, BAM, horse's head."

"What do girlfriends and sperm have in common? They both always seem to end up in your clothes"

"What did the mobster call it when he couldn't move his dead friend's body? Rigatoni!"

"I just hit a Smart car and now it's my hood ornament."

"9/11 Threesome. When twins go down on you."

"Girl, you don't even know how crazy I am about you.... I'm thinking about digging my mom up so she can meet you."

"wife: know what today is? me: yep wife: on 2 together: 1, 2 wife: Happy Anniver.. me: 3 MONTHS UNTIL.. wife:..sary me: wife: me: ..Santa"

"I was once told ""There is great strength in numbers""... Someone once told me ""There is great safety in numbers""; I could only think, ""Now go tell that to six million jews""..."