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Joke of the Day

"I was once told ""There is great strength in numbers""... Someone once told me ""There is great safety in numbers""; I could only think, ""Now go tell that to six million jews""..."

"What does a South Carolina cop do when a panda runs away from him? Shoots him 8 times in the black."

"A woman walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a double entendre So he gives her one."

"Why do abortion clinics make bad OP's? ... because they don't deliver..."

"Do you need a silencer if you are going to shoot a mine?"

"Modern art is easy to understand. If you take a dump on someone's door mat, ring the bell and run away - it's an installation. If you ring the bell and then take a dump - it's a performance."

"I keep my head held high because I know there's a beautiful deaf, mute & blind woman out there that's going to find me irresistible one day."

"If your dog is fat it means that you don't get enough exercise."

"WAITER: How is everything? ME: Soul crushing and void of meaning W: I meant your meal M: Soul crushing, void of meaning, and needs salt"

"The Hunger Games is the thinking girls Twilight I don't dislike Hunger Games but everyone over 20 knows this is a joke."