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Joke of the Day

"1. What do you call a man with a flamethrower? 2. What do you call his first victim? 3. What do you call his second victim? 1. Bernie 2. Crispin 3. Ash"

"What's long and hard on a black man? The first grade."

"Helen Keller walks into a bar And a chair. And a table."

"""Doctor, Doctor... I've had diarrhea for 3 days, and I think it might be hereditary"" ""Hereditary? What makes you think it's hereditary?"" ""It's in my jeans"""

"My son ran away again, but it gets worse. He changed the wifi password before he left."

"I really hope that death is a woman. That way it will never come for me."

"My music teacher at school told me never to hit a drum again or I could get in serious trouble. I did, and he was right. There was serious re-percussions"

"Knock Knock Knock knock Who's there? Daisy Daisy who? DAISY ME ROLLING, THEY HATING"

"How do you start a conversation about men's rights? Mention feminism."

"Is my corny pun... A-maize-zing?"