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Joke of the Day

"Why don't blind people go skydiving? Because it scares the crap out of their dogs."

"What's better than roses on your piano? Tulips on your organ ;)"

"Why did the pig join a muscle-building class? He thought ""pumping iron"" was a new juice dispenser."

"Why did the man with one butt cheek get fired? He did everything half-assed."

"Life's like a box of chocolate, it doesn't last very long for fat people."

"Pokemon Go Is Just Like Tinder Both apps require you to swipe to catch monsters in your area."

"My boss My boss hates when I shorten his name to Dick. Especially since his name is Stephen."

"What's the difference between a thief and a peeping Tom? Well, a thief snatches watches..."

"Just had a really enlightening yoga session! LOLJK! I'm drinking warm whiskey out of a water bottle designed for hamsters."

"To the person who honked to get me out of my parking space faster, thank you for inspiring me to delete 3000 emails right here, right now."