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Joke of the Day
"Why do mermaids wear sea shells? Because they can't fit in d-shells. Edit: re wording"
Next Joke
"What did Arnold Schwarzenegger say when Sylvester Stallone wanted to dress up as classical composers for Halloween? ""You be Beethoven, I'll be Bach."""
"What do you call a bouncy plane? Boeing Boeing Boeing"
"People usually stop coming over to your house when you greet them with ""Make yourself at home, BUT WHATEVER YOU DO DON'T OPEN THE FREEZER."""
"What is ISIS's favorite type of text? Is the answer: A: Heading B: Heading C: Heading"
"Do you know the biggest difference between Mexico and China? China paid for it's wall."
"What do you call a shipping crate full of snails? Escargot."
"""This guy gets it."" - me, whenever I see someone sleeping"
"How many black people does it take to start a riot? One less than before"
"How can we be sure the government wasn't involved in the Kennedy assassination? Well he's dead, isn't he? (Adapted from Neil Gaiman's *American Gods*)"