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Joke of the Day
"Why does 7 and 8 feel very uncomfortable? Because they're stuck between a 69."
Next Joke
"What does the broken clock do when it gets hungry? It goes back four seconds!"
"Why did the farmer stop smoking with his cattle? Because the steaks were too high..."
"Deadpool was Green Lantern Batman was Daredevil Captain America was Human Torch And we're just gonna walk around like EVERYTHING is OK???"
"You know why yoga is so unpopular for men? Well women don't mind muff diving but dudes don't like to suck their own dicks."
"Overheard from a 14 year old: Why does Donald Trump watch the Olympics? To see how high Mexicans can pole vault"
"Young God: ok, a little hydrogen and- *chemistry set explodes* Mom: what was that?! God: nothing! *scoops resulting universe into shoebox*"
"What is Captain Hook's favorite kind of humor? Dead Pan."
"So many girls look so cute and pretty when they cry then there's me where i look like a dying horse"
"I used to date an anaesthetist... She was a local girl. [credit to seeing this on QI]"