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Joke of the Day

"So Rick Perry drops his presidential bid Today.. I thought his campaign wasn't for late term abortions."

"My youngest son gave me a dead leg yesterday. Now I'm wondering where he got it from."

"Don't hand me the phone Don't hand me the phone Don't hand me th-HIIIIII GRANDMA I'M GOOOOOD..."

"What's the difference between your job and a dead prostitute? Your job still sucks"

"when I was little, I drugged the milk to catch Santa. Next morning I found my dad passed out on the stairs. Well played Santa.."

"Your mother is a head turner By that I mean that the gravitational field of her planetary body is trying to pull my head in orbit"

"What is the definition of safe sex for rednecks... Making sure you brand all the sheep that kick"

"What version of windows does Jesus use? XP Edit: [Explanation](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chi_Rho)"

"The Three Laws of Secure Computing 1) Don't buy a computer. 2) If you do buy a computer don't plug it in. 3) If you do plug it in sell it and return to step 1."

"Friday...Gods Gift to the working People"