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Joke of the Day

"Q: What do you get when you cross a poisonous snake with a horse? A: I dunno, but if it bites you, you can ride it to the hospital!"

Next Joke
 
"Rumours suggest Usain Bolt has been cheating on his wife. I'm amazed she hasn't caught him. Then I remembered that he can finish in 9.58 seconds."
"My favorite music-related limerick A tutor who taught on the flute, tried to teach two young tooters to toot. Said the two to the tutor, ""Is it harder to toot or, to tutor two tooters to toot?"""
"[dad accidentally steps on the dog] I'm sorry girl, I didn't see you. Are you ok? [dad accidentally steps on me] Why are you on the floor?!"
"Did you hear those loud tennis players last night? They were causing quite the racket."
"What do you call a girl who pushed her father off a cliff? Pushpa!!"
"What did the poor, unfortunate, paraplegic kid get for christmas? Cancer."
"What's the most efficient way to break up with someone? Murder. I had to post this to r/jokes to keep from implicating myself"
"What's got four legs and one arm? A Rottweiler."
"I've got a new pet salamander.. I named it Tiny because it is my newt"