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Joke of the Day

"What did the poor, unfortunate, paraplegic kid get for christmas? Cancer."

"What Do Eskimos Get From Sitting On The Ice too Long? Polaroids!"

"Honey, am I fat? Of course not! You just interact a bit more with the Higgs field."

"Never trust couscous. It's just fat sand."

"What do you call the surgery when a woman gets a sex change? Addadictomy"

"That was actually pretty funny. But, I don't like you. Therefore, I will not laugh."

"A secretary walks into her boss's office and says, ""Can I use your Dictaphone?"" He says, ""No, dial with your finger like everyone else."""

"Why did the Oregon State psychology major climb up the chain link fence? To see what was on the other side."

"What a weekend... apparently gonorrhea is NOT a girl's best friend."

"If you say a number loud enough its value increases. * 5 = 5 * 5! = 120"