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Joke of the Day

"What do Michael Jackson and Jimmy Savile have in common? they touched some many lives"

"With Girls Gone Wild bankrupt wild girls no longer have a home. Many of them will be put down. Please. Adopt a wild girl. Before she's gone."

"Heard of the cannibal who had a shit taste in people? You could say he was surrounded by assholes."

"I had diarrhea and had some jalapeno sauce That came out badly"

"My local feminist charity is hiring. I found their recruitment slogan to be a bit counterintuitive... ""Girl power needs manpower."""

"I hate when I'm singing and some idiot thinks they can join in with me... this is not Glee."

"Why does Kevin Bacon not get more leading roles in Hollywood? Because it's not kosher. http://36.media.tumblr.com/cb0ad7dd38767e0fc2363665afdb5cdd/tumblr_inline_ntae7hsEL21tw80r8_1280.jpg"

"One man's porn is another man's...well, porn, really. It's pretty much all porn for us. Nice sweater."

"I think I lost an electron I'm feeling pretty positive though"

"If you fall outta your car in your driveway, it's your own asphalt."