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Joke of the Day

"You ever stick your dick in pecan pie? It's fucking nuts."

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"Chuck Norris once kicked a horse in the chin. Its decendants are known today as Giraffes."
"I made a company that disguises land mines as prayer mats... Prophets are through the roof"
"If Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton get in a plane crash who survives? America Survives."
"I used to be a halogen but then I took a proton to the Ne"
"If the United States ever collapses, the upside is that we can finally use the blue starry part of American flags to make wizard hats."
"Why did the mushroom go to the party? Because he was a fungi!"
"The funniest joke of all time tbh My life... God seems to be laughing..."
"Hey guys, trust me on this one, tweets aren't nearly as funny when they're being read aloud in a courtroom."
"If you have 4 pencils and 7 apples, how many pancakes will fit on the roof? Purple. Because aliens don't wear hats."