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Joke of the Day

"Why did Luke Skywalker get in trouble for using the Live Long and Prosper sign? It's because he was accused of cultural appropriation."

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"Where did Nicholas II of Russia get his coffee? Tsarbucks."
"when she gives me her autograph I love it when she signs the restraining order without dotting the i with a heart, playing hard to get I see!"
"My son can't handle going to camp this year. It's in tents"
"Stay away from a place called, ""Farm Fresh Restaurant"". I ordered the chicken soup. A rooster walked up and teabagged his ball$ in a hot bowl of water at my table."
"What do you call 2 polar bears jerking each other off? Bi-polar"
"What do you call it when you get an erection at a funeral? Mourning Wood."
"What do you call a hobo with an afro? A frobo."
"The world would be a better place if everybody drank alcohol. It would get even better if some of them choked on it."
"[911 call] ""My hand's stuck in a blender!"" ""Turn it on then."" ""What?"" "" I can't hear it, turn it on so I know you're not lying."""