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Joke of the Day

"How do you celebrate July 4th in Canada? Not by getting drunk and blowing off your fingers, because it's just a regular day fir you."

"What does a pig use to write his term papers with? Pen and Oink!"

"What do you call a giant squid who runs a tow service in Indonesia? A Kraken-towa!"

"""Get off your high horse!"" - Veterinarian who prescribed medical marijuana."

"Kim Khardasian and Kanye West named their children North West and Saint West. But to prove I'm a worse parent... I plan on naming my children...Kim Khardashian and Kanye West"

"Do you want to join the ""P"" club? Congratulations, ur-ine!"

"One thing's for sure: People who don't know the difference between ""Your"" and ""You're"" and ""To"" and ""Too"" have strong opinions on Facebook."

"My dad has a weird hobby, he collects empty bottles. Which sounds a lot better than alcoholic."

"I'm with you, Hungry Hungry Hippos. I don't find small plastic balls very filling, either. I can't believe this what you guys eat in Africa!"

"Why do dogs hate outer space? Because they strongly dislike vacuums."