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Joke of the Day

"It's my CakeDay. Here's a joke I wrote. My British friend is a bit of a freak. He sniffs African women's underwear when they're on their period. - - - ^^Bloody ^^nickers ^^lover..."

"What finally killed Captain Hook? Jock Itch!"

"I remember, before kids, saying funny things like, ""my kids won't be watching TV and they most certainly won't be eating chicken nuggets!"""

"My first workout back at the gym was great... I did 15 mins of cardio, 10 mins on the defibrillator, and then 3 days in the hospital."

"Why did they give a megaphone to the dog who couldn't climb a tree? Because he couldn't bark"

"I need a joke for a medical residency interview! Halp!"

"Why did the chicken droid NOT cross the road? Because it had a bad motivator!"

"I hired a prostitute to indulge my food fetish. She said that for $500 we could spend the night licking food off each other's bodies, although if I wanted guacamole it was $1.80 extra."

"A young couple are in bed for the very first time The guy asks "" Are you nervous?""--- ""Yes "" she says.--- ""Is this your first time?""--- ""No, i've been nervous before"""

"HAPPY NEW YEARS EVE: It takes 24,637 BOLTS to put a car together, but only one NUT to spread it all over the road. Don't Drink & Drive!"