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Joke of the Day

"My wife is a vegan. I'm not. I don't care if she makes more money than me. I can still say that I'm the one who brings home the bacon."

"I think the little ledges in front of windows are silly."

"Maybe we got it wrong and God just wanted to play doctor for a day: 'Here Moses, take these two tablets and call me in the morning'"

"What's the difference between a vitamin and a hormone? You can't hear a vitamin."

"Do you want to know a good Jewish wine? Ma, when are we going to Miami?"

"A beggar once asked me, ""Any change?"" I said, ""Nope. You're still broke."""

"My wife keeps complaining about her nine to five job I must admit, 4:51 is a strange time to start work"

"What do you call a priest that becomes a lawyer? A father in law."

"I have PTSD from catching a glimpse of a co-worker's pale belly roll during a meeting."

"I bet you are a Taurus... because you are a fat cow."