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Joke of the Day

"What did the SJW say to the person who had just been blackmailed? At least you didn't get white maled."

"When someone asks me if I'm busy, it always sounds like a trick question."

"Sure, 50% of marriages end in divorce and yeah, that's sad. But 100% of married people will die, and isn't that a greater tragedy?"

"Cheesy joke A muenster attacked Emmenthal institution. Everyone cheddared with panic. There was de brie everywhere. It was no Gouda."

"That awkward moment when you're trying to get over someone you were never dating."

"Mother's may get a day, but shark's get a whole week! Mom sharks get 1 week AND a day. ...don't even get me started on black shark moms."

"Hillary Clinton"

"Fords coming out with heated tailgates. So your hands stay warm while you're pushing it home."

"I tried to figure out why the tennis ball was getting bigger. Then it hit me."

"guard your heart, cater to no man's ego, honor your own time and your energy, don't use uber. happy 2015."