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Joke of the Day

"I got stopped by a woman in the street today. She said, ""Excuse me, sir, have you had an accident in the last three years that wasn't your fault?"" I said, ""Yes, she's nearly 2 now."""

Next Joke
 
"""It's 10 o'clock. Do you know where your son is?"" ""I'm at home, mom. You raised a loser."""
"Knock knock! Come in."
"Do you know why Santa Claus doesn't have any kids? Because he only gets to come once a year and thats down a chimney."
"My favorite dinosaur is the Clitorous, its is the smallest of the dinosaurs, it is also hard to find because it likes to hide in the bushes Credit goes to comedian Etta May."
"Why did the sperm cross the road? Because it was my first wank in a week"
"If I were Jesus I would be seriously spooked by all the buildings with giant crosses."
"How Wonderful Did you hear the story of the man that had the great honor of being crushed by a steam roller? He was flattered"
"The only thing we have to fear is fear itself. And rape. Also, the dark. And being buried alive. Mondays. Most people, too. (and insects)"
"I just got a new hearse Everyone is dying to take a ride in it"