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Joke of the Day

"If a cop is at the door when I answer, I yell into the house ""Anyone order a stripper?"" then say ""Sorry, wrong house"" & slam the door shut."

"So I was listening to classical music really loudly the other day when suddenly... My speakers Baroque."

"Concerning the absence of toilet paper, there should be complaint books laid out at publicly used places."

"Why did Moses see a burning bush as God? Because God planned on giving him his first tablets then. The mistake? They were Samsung Galaxy Note tablets."

"See ya later, alligator. After a while, crocodile. Catch ya manana, little iguana."

"So Nicolas Cage and John Travolta walk into a bar and the bartender says ""hey, why the wrong face?"""

"Why did Angela Merkel ban use of crabgrass lawn treatments? She was told they would stop the ""German nation"""

"Sweet potatoes are just regular potatoes that remember birthdays and anniversaries."

"Bully For You Q: Why did the bully go to beauty school? A: She wanted to tease hair"

"My girlfriend said things needed spicing up a bit in the bedroom, so she introduced me to pegging. It did the trick we've been together ten years now. Give or take."