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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between a dirty bus stop and a lobster with breast implants ? One's a crusty bus station and the other is a busty crustacean"

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"I tried learning trigonometry under the hot sun Only thing i got was a tan"
"I'm not one to brag about my financial skills, but my credit card company calls me almost every day to tell me my balance is outstanding. ~ Rob DenBleyker (Cyanide & Happiness)"
"The inventor of autocorrect has died... The inventor of autocorrect has died. I didn't even know he was I'll"
"Ro-Ro-Robocop, Gently down the stream, Merrily, merrily, merrily, merrily, Killing bad guys in old Detroit in revenge for his murder."
"How many white people does it take to change a lightbulb? None, they just hire a mexican to do it."
"What did tarzan say when he saw a herd of elephants in the distance? ""Look, a herd of elephants in the distance!"""
"Tons of guys wave at me when I drive my wife's car."
"Joke Police arrested a drunkard & askd: Where r u going.. Man: I-m going 2 listen lecture on ill effects of drinking. Cop: Who-ll lecture at midnight .. Man: My wife.."
"Why couldn't the melons be together? Everyone knows melons cantaloupe."