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Joke of the Day
"By Putting the Punchline in the Title How do you screw up a joke?"
Next Joke
"What does America and my Milk have in common? Both will go bad in 9 days."
"General Contractor: Don't worry ma'am, everything will be ready, we'll have the scaffolding set up and erected. Me: *mutes phone* hahahahaha"
"What's the difference between a Hoover and a Harley? The location of the dirtbag."
"It was so difficult giving Dracula fellatio! I guess I went down for the count."
"How many potatoes does it take to kill an Irishman? None source: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Great_Famine_(Ireland)"
"What do you get when you throw a grenade into a french kitchen? Linoleum Blownapart"
"whats the difference between girl M&M's and boy M&M's? Boy M&M's have nuts."
"I was this close to having a threesome last night... Just needed two more people."
"Having dinner with my phone and some people."