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Joke of the Day

"Having dinner with my phone and some people."

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"When God eats mushrooms He has delusions of regular."
"How does a German tie his shoes? In little Nazis"
"A man was hospitalized with 6 plastic horses up his ass.......... The doctor described his condition as stable."
"Why does an actor enjoy his work so much? Because it's all play."
"I made on offensive joke about Muslims... and boom, I lost my job."
"Doctor Doctor You've got to help me - I just can't stop my hands shaking Do you drink a lot? Not really - I spill most of it!"
"Why did your sister jump out the window ? Because she wanted to try out her new spring suit"
"My girlfriend called me a pedophile ""That's a pretty big word for a 10 year old"", I told her."
"How do you get a Jewish girls number? roll her sleeve up"