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Joke of the Day

"I couldn't find the thingy that peels the potatoes and the carrots, so I asked the kids... Apparently she left me two days ago."

"Why did the dog bark? because its a dog"

"two men walk into a bar... the other one ducks"

"My girlfriend told me that my dick is two inches bigger than her ex's. And that is why she will never go back into a lesbian relationship."

"Where do you find 100 fat cows? At bingo"

"What do you call a demon that lives in your butt? An ass-soul"

"Dad Dinosaur: Look son a shooting star make a wish! Angsty Teen Dinosaur: I wish it would hit us and kill us all."

"I was watching the London Marathon and saw one runner dressed as a chicken and another runner dressed as an egg. I thought: 'This could be interesting'"

"is Harry potter rasict What's the difference about Harry potter and a jew? Harry made it out of the chambers alive"

"SOME DUDE IN A LAB IS WORKING ON BRINGING THE PTERODACTYL BACK TO LIFE SO ENJOY THOSE EVENING STROLLS WHILE YOU CAN!"