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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a demon that lives in your butt? An ass-soul"

"Why do they wear skirts in New Zealand? Because sheep can hear a zipper from a mile away."

"Happy birthday to rapper Pitbull who is 34 today, or 238 in dog years for all the other Pitbulls."

"My girlfriend said to me in bed last night, 'you're a pervert' I said, 'that's a big word for a girl of nine.'"

"As a literalist, I can't watch porno... There's too many holes in the plot. I thought of this while reading a reddit comment section, so thank you reddit :)"

"HULK WANT LOAN Bank: We can't loan to people like you. GREEN PEOPLE?? *flips table into moon* Bank: People owing 2.6B in property damage."

"What is the difference between God and a police officer? God doesn't think he's a police officer."

"Chelsea asks Hilary to dinner 100k for a meet-and-greet, 250 to say hello and 400,000 for dinner."

"The good news is, that bag of clothes from 1998 that I still haven't taken to the donation centre...they are back in style now."

"In the case of emergencies, why are women and children evacuated first? So that men can think for a solution in silence."