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Joke of the Day

"Why does Trump only use a laptop computer? Because of the small keyboard."

"It sucks that slavery is illegal now... We have to get them from the black market these days."

"So sick of musicians telling lovers in songs that they'd give them stuff if they only had it to give. That's too easy, assholes."

"During Peter Andre's early acting career he decided to get rid of the X at the end of his name... He was only getting shit rolls."

"A lion wouldn't cheat at golf... But a tiger woods"

"How do you find Will Smith in the snow? You look for the fresh prints"

"A duck walks into a pharmacy and buys some chapstick. He says to the cashier ""put it on my bill""."

"90% of your body is water. 6% is delusion. 4% is lies."

"I'm pretty sure this new iTunes update is gonna turn things around for me."

"I really love the way the earth rotates... It makes my day."