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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a fatality that results from friendly fire in a gang war? Homiecide"

"The only drinking problem I have is not having enough money to keep buying it."

"How is a meditating monk and a fiber-optic cable similar? Total internal reflection."

"When I see couples madly in love, I just assume they met yesterday."

"Having kids is like being at a press conference: ""No, you can't put the dog in the washer - next question."" ""No, you can't really fly -next"""

"How does a West Virginia husband tell if his wife is on the rag? (NSFW) He sucks his son's dick to see if it tastes like shit."

"What did the grape say when the elephant stepped on him? Nothing. He just let out a little wine."

"I bought some shoes from my dealer. I don't know what he laced them with, but I've been tripping all day."

"What do you call gay paraplegics? Fruits and vegetables!"

"What kind of bees make milk, not honey? Boo(bees)"