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Joke of the Day

"I am the Dread Pirate Roberts of poverty. Taking ever increasing doses, hoping that one day I'll become immune."

"We should re-fi, so we can get some hi-fi and watch sci-fi on the wi-fi."

"What do Augusto Pinochet and New Guns n Roses have in common? They've both committed atrocities in South American stadiums."

"After Israel threatened to take the Security Council vote as an act of war, the New Zealand Ambassador called Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu.... ...Picking up the phone, he spoke ""Hebrew."""

"never trust a person who says they don't like chocolate, even dogs eat chocolate and it kills them"

"You're good, Adobe Acrobat. You're fine just the way you are. No need to continue updating every three days."

"Harrison Ford has broken his ankle. There will now be a new Star Wars cast."

"What do you call a sad coffee? Depresso"

"When do you stop on green and go on red? When you are eating watermelon ."

"What did the dad buffalo say to his son when he dropped him off at school? Bison"