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Joke of the Day
"I don't go to Applebee's often I know how to microwave my own meals"
Next Joke
"You find out who your real friends are when all you have left to offer is friendship."
"How does a vampire get through life with only one fang? He has to grin and bare it."
"Wife sneezed... ... and told me she was allergic to my hotness. My response: so do you break out in sex?"
"Knock knock. Who's there? To. To who? It's ""to whom."""
"I accidentally left a butt plug up her ass for 2 weeks... No shit"
"I'm on my way to Williston, ND. It's the most in the middle of nowhere I've ever been. I plan to show them the iPad and claim to be Jesus."
"Just been chatting to my neighbor's teenage daughter It turns out she's really into aliens and UFOs Which is cool because tommorow she's getting abducted"
"Taco Bell is human Drano"
"what do you do when your wife turns 40 exchange her for 2 20s"