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Joke of the Day

"""I love u"" ""Umm isn't it a bit too soon to say I love you?"" ""Oh ha I meant the letter U. What's your fav u word? Mine is Unreciprocated lol"""

"What's the difference between a happy programmer and a sad programmer? ""Hello, world"" and ""Goodbye, cruel world"""

"Why didn't Ahmadinejad have a beer? He wasn't in the MahMoud."

"Chuck Norris likes knitting sweaters...... if by knitting you mean kicking and by sweaters you mean babies......"

"I asked my North Korean friend how it was there He said he couldn't complain."

"What's the difference between a Catholic wife and a Jewish wife? A Catholic wife has real orgasms and fake jewelry"

"Men statistically have larger brains than women, which is why men are usually smarter and elephants rule us all from their laser-hovercraft"

"Forgot to put the salmon in the fridge after dinner so tomorrow for lunch, I'll have the salmon and the shits."

"Apple Products My friend asked me why I don't like Apple products. Told her that the cables remind me of my ex-gf, white and kink-free."

"I was in Starbucks the other day and I saw a guy who dropped his coffee on the floor by mistake..... I said to the man ""wow, you actually dropped it like it's hot"""