72100

Joke of the Day

"Forgot to put the salmon in the fridge after dinner so tomorrow for lunch, I'll have the salmon and the shits."

"Did you hear about the Italian Chef with terminal cancer? He pastaway."

"My hobbies include working out, staying fit, eating healthy, and lying."

"I was getting a blowjob and I told the girl to treat my dick like a jolly rancher.... and keep on sucking."

"You can't hear me! She: ""You are so deaf. You never hear me."" He: ""I heard you. I was just looking at my new watch."" She: ""Oh yeah? What kind is it?"" He: Six o'clock!"""

"I may have hit rock bottom, but the upside of being down here, is I can see up all of your skirts. As you were."

"Sarah Palin's new Christmas book is her attempt at valuing the sanctity Christmas so she can sell books and make money just like baby Jesus."

"TIL Only three types of mammals go through menopause. The Blue Whale, The Beluga Whale, and You're Mom"

"Why can't you tell a secret, when a clock is around Because time will tell. Got this one from Bonzi Buddy long time ago"

"I like going to the park and watching the children run around... ...because they don't know I'm using blanks."