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Joke of the Day

"Who is the most popular guy in a swingers' club? The guy who can carry a dozen doughnuts without using his hands. Who's the most popular woman? The one who can get the last one without using hers."

"Q: Why do we put candles on top of a birthday cake? A: Because it's too hard to put them on the bottom! #HappyBirthdayBob"

"I reported my own accident on Waze Hence, the accident."

"Why does the Coast Guard have a 6 foot height requirement? So when their ship sinks they can walk back to shore."

"If I were to remove my intestines and lay them out, they'd reach all the way to my ex-wife's house. SEE, DEBORAH? I'M A MESS WITHOUT YOU!"

"Where did the pilgrims land when they came to America ? On their feet !"

"Every crime show turns into sitcom when the cops bring the husband for questioning and he asks, ""Why would anyone want to kill their wife?"""

"There's no better feeling than not giving a fuck."

"What does the country of Brazil and tent sex have in common? Camp penis."

"What instrument does God play? He plays the cello. As it says in scripture: ""Our God is a cellist God."""