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Joke of the Day

"My brother is addicted to break fluid... But he says he can stop any time."

"A naked woman robbed a bank... No one could remember her face."

"How does Moses make tea? Hebrews it :D"

"If you want big tips... ...circumcise an elephant."

"What do gyms and prisons have in common? They both have ripped assholes"

"I'm pretty sure I'm a hypochondriac."

"Did you hear about the wooden car with the wooden engine and wooden wheels? It wooden move."

"Why did the redneck drive his pickup truck over the edge of a cliff? -- He wanted to test out his new air brakes."

"What do you call a short clairvoyant person who just broke out of prison? A small medium at large."

"Guy at the cake shop: So is this for a friend? Me: No, it's for me. Apparently it's weird that I've had 9 birthdays this year."