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Joke of the Day

"If you want big tips... ...circumcise an elephant."

"Which two musicians are famous for saying, ""What?"" Lil' Jon and Beethoven."

"Son:Dad, what is 'creeping inflation'? Father:It's when your mother starts out asking for new shoes and ends up with a complete new outfit."

"Bill Clinton right now, texting Monica Lewinsky ""You up?"""

"Smokey the Bear just told me that only *I* could prevent forest fires. This is a lot of pressure, people."

"Why does Anna's mom encourage her daughter to experiment with sexuality? Because she lives bicuriously through others ."

"I wrote a poem that says: I dig, you dig, they dig, we dig It isn't pretty, but it is very deep."

"Cheer up Hilary! At least you won't have to work at the same desk that Monica spent so much time under."

"I signed up for Binary 101... but it turned out to be a level 5 course. Corny, but I'm still proud of myself."

"What happens every year when the Time Square Ball drops? Justin Bieber gets jealous."