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Joke of the Day

"Life is like a jar of jellybeans Everyone hates the black ones."

"[Ouija board] ""Hey spirits, talk to us"" W H A T S U R F R I E N D S N A M E H E S C U T E ""fml"""

"Why did the boy feel warm on his birthday? Because people kept toasting him!"

"The problem with the exclamation point & question mark being side by side on a keyboard: I'm so sorry your grandma died? I love you?"

"Did you hear about the new pill that's supposed to turn lesbian women straight? It's called tricoxagain."

"What is it exactly that separates man from animal? Divorce"

"I call my Penis Batman... ... Woman love it, when the dark night rises."

"Cop to driver: ""How high are you?"" Driver to cop: ""No, no, no. You're supposed to say 'Hi, how are you?'"""

"What do you call a bunch of pro wrestlers hitting each other with blocks of cheddar and wheels of gouda? Battle Royale with cheese."

"At what age did the world's greatest sushi chef begin his training? Tuna half."