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Joke of the Day

"Cop to driver: ""How high are you?"" Driver to cop: ""No, no, no. You're supposed to say 'Hi, how are you?'"""

"I like what you did with your hair How'd you get it to stick out of your nose like that?"

"What's black and blue and doesn't like sex? The cheerleader in my trunk."

"Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? The p is silent."

"I wanna make a toast to blind hookers you really gotta hand it to them."

"I'm invincible. I can not be Vinced"

"[VIDEO] John Oliver Agrees With You For 22 Minutes"

"Who are the fastest readers in the world? The people in the world trade center, these mother fuckers blew threw a hundred stories in two seconds!"

"She sells sea shells by the sea shore because she graduated from an online university."

"My friends eyes are so skewed.. [Original Joke] He looks like a cow"