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Joke of the Day
"What is the opposite of Christopher Reeves? Christopher Walken"
Next Joke
"I just had to fire my Korean housekeeper... ...She kept trying to wok the dog."
"When I see a person with facial tattoos, I also know that I will see them in handcuffs if I follow them around long enough."
"Police now use an iPhone app that scans irises to ID suspects. It replaces their previous method: scanning for dark skin"
"OPPOSITES IF PRO IS THE OPPOSITE OF CON. WHAT IS THE OPPOSITE OF PRO-GRESS? CON-GRESS"
"Dating is like vitamins If you don't go outside much you won't get the D."
"You know what's odd about those girls at Starbucks? They, like, literally can't, even."
"What did the gay guy, say to the man at the bar? Can I push your stool in?"
"Did you hear about the Anorexic Jedi? She had to be force fed."
"Just dropped my new single it's me i'm single"