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Joke of the Day
"[1st date] date: ...you said you had abs me: [squints] everyone has abdominal muscles, Susan"
Next Joke
"I try contributing to society but it keeps insisting I take it back."
"My Day is Going to be a Small Celebration to a Nordic God It'll be a Loki Day"
"What is Yellow and Red? That is *the* ultimate question."
"What is a ghost boxer called? A phantomweight."
"Donkey kong, king kong, and a smart blonde fight on top of the empire state building. Who wins? None of them, they don't exist!"
"Did you know that men are more successful than women in committing suicides? Ladies, can you gals do anything right?"
"If gravity were a person... He'd be pretty down to earth."
"What's the difference between a lawyer and God? God doesn't think he's a lawyer."
"Why did Helen Keller masturbate with only one hand? So she could moan with the other."